I’m just aghast at the latest information I heard from a friend: seems a couple we know who was an important part of a neighboring school-based community broke up a few months ago, and now the ex-husband is specifically insisting that the child not go to the school any more.
Because it’s the main support community for his soon-to-be ex-wife, a place where she’s valued and has other moms with whom to share her life and try to get through each day.
What baffles me is what this guy is thinking here.
If this story really is true – and the wife and child have both vanished from their community from what I hear – then is this just a case of spite trumping any sort of reason at all?
Even if he really wants to twist the knife in his ex-wife’s heart after their breakup, what about the child? Their daughter’s still a little wee one and I just can’t imagine how Mommy is going to explain to her that she can’t go to school with her friends and see her teacher any more because, well, because Daddy absolutely forbids it.
My opinion is that she should tell him to take a hike (or, perhaps, the same thing, albeit in more colorful language), but I can easily imagine that she’d be out on the street with no support and minimal income if he stopped helping out.
It’s not much of a stretch to imagine a dialog like:
he: I’m not having our girl going to that school any more!
she: That’s her home, she loves it there, I don’t want her to change schools mid-year.
he: Tough luck.
she: And what if I send her there anyway?
he: Then you’ll never see a dime from me.
Not a pleasant situation. But nothing we can get involved with either, of course. Just another of those spats and fights, sometimes quite unpleasant, where you have to sit on the sidelines and hope that it resolves gracefully as quickly as possible and try to forget that sometimes it never does…